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 Pixel gemstones - Amethyst  Welcome to Our Treasures! Pixel gemstones - Amethyst 
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Bullet; Red This group automatically accepts all things being submitted, but featured is limited to one per day!
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" Featured"
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" Brag" 
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Featured
1973 by RGPC
Soft, Suave, Disgusting (Sebastian Black Butler) by AlexisYokoAlexander
Grelliam Fanfiction : Finally, At PeaceBefore reading : This is a Grell x William (Black Butler) fanfiction. Unlike my first Grelliam fanfiction, this one isn't NSFW, but there are some parts in which I briefly mention violence, and is more emotional than my other fanfictions. This one is about Grell's thoughts and feelings. I hope you'll enjoy it!Despite being generally happy, Grell had many regrets. One of those regrets was that she couldn't give birth. She wasn't infertile, but she was born in a male body. Even if she was able to have biological children, she could never get pregnant and connect with them in the way she wanted to. This regret would never leave her.... Grell never felt so close to someone in order to talk about it in depth with them. She talked to William about her worries, but she wouldn't talk about this subject that much. He couldn't possibly understand. She tried, just to get things off her chest. William would listen, and he would feel bad for her, but he could never understand her. Of course she felt safe enough with William, but how could she talk about such a problem with him? He was good at comforting her, but everything stopped there. William didn't know how to manage his own emotions. He would mostly repress them and try to do something to distract himself. Anything that would work, as long as he wouldn't have to face his dark thoughts. He would rarely confess to Grell. He didn't even want to admit some things to himself. He would rather listen to Grell's confessions, while hugging her for what usually felt like an eternity. She always felt better after spending time with William, yet, she was still craving for someone who understands her pain.And she finally found her. She found Madam Red. Was Grell the right person at the right place and moment? Or just the opposite? Due to an accident, Madam Red wasn't able to have children either. She even felt envy and hatred towards other women, just like Grell. Especially the women who had abortions. Madam Red was in a very dark place mentally. Grell didn't really helped her. She would only fuel that hatred they both had and then they would release it through committing unspeakable acts. They couldn't think rationally. That was their idea of justice. They were partners. Both in crime and in suffering. They understood each other. They completed each other. They would bring out the best, but also the worst in each other. After all these years, Grell found someone who understands her situation. She loved Madam Red. As a friend, as a sister, or maybe as more than this... Grell didn't know for sure. All she knew was that she found a safe space with Madam Red. She felt safe with William, but it wasn't the same. Grell didn't know what happened in her heart. Was she actually in love with Madam Red? Was she actually in love with William? Did she still love him? Was Madam Red a release or a curse for Grell? It doesn't matter anymore.Everything is over now. All those deaths, finalized with Madam Red's death... Everything is really over. Grell lost herself again. Grell lost her safe space. Because of her impulsiveness, she lost her beloved Madam Red. Only her red coat would remember Grell of the sister she once had. Will Madam Red ever reach heaven? Will she spend the eternity in purgatory? Will she go straight to hell? Grell would pray for her. And she would also pray for herself. Not only she lost her safe space with Madam Red, but she also lost her safe space with William. Madam Red and William understood Grell in different ways. Madam Red shared the pain of not being able to have children with her. And for William, he always felt like a misfit in society. Just like Grell. He wouldn't let it show much, but he cared about Grell a lot. Grell had a feeling he might love her back. But now, she's not sure of anything anymore. William was very disappointed in Grell after what she did with Madam Red and to Madam Red. He didn't even want to look her in the eyes. He didn't even want to see her. On top of mourning Madam Red, she also had to mourn losing the safe space with the man she loved for a very long time. Grell really thought William is too far to reach now. She really thought she lost him forever. Did she actually ever love him? Was she loving only the safe space he gave her? No, that safe space was the reason why she loved him.Grell's feelings for someone were never so intense before. Nobody made her feel so happy before. Nobody made her feel so... strong before. William was the first person to ever respect Grell's identity as a woman. He was the first to take her seriously. He was the first to make her feel safe and respected as a woman. She never felt good about being transgender. She always considered herself "God's mistake". But how were her feelings towards being trans going to change anything? The situation wouldn't change, doesn't matter how much she would cry. She could only accept it. She could only accept she was "God's mistake". Grell's biggest regret was never going to vanish. It would never go away... only maybe after her redemption. But who knows when will Grell actually reach her redemption? Will she ever reach it? Did the grim reapers ever heard of someone reaching their redemption? Grell didn't know any case. She wasn't sure of her own situation right now. She wanted to reach that redemption. But more importantly, she wanted to go back in William's arms. She only made him suffer even more. They had problems before, but it was never this bad. Grell felt like she deserved every second of her punishment. But she couldn't bear not seeing William, or even worse, the thought of him purposely avoiding her. During the entire time of her suspension, Grell didn't even dare to smile, flirt with guys, or do anything she usually enjoys. She didn't feel like herself anymore. Regardless of her promiscuous behavior, regardless of her tendency to catch feeling easily, Grell would always come back to William. William was her true love. She couldn't bear the fact that she hurt him. She couldn't dare to ever think he would forgive her. But he did.A few days after her suspension ended, William went to Grell's house and they talked for a while. He would apologize for his overly violent behavior and she would apologize for every time she ever hurt him in any way. Grell told William that she wasn't mad at him to begin with, and that it would be understandable if he couldn't forgive her. She told him she would take anything he wants to give her. She would accept more field work, more paper work, physical punishment... anything as long as he wouldn't completely ignore her. William caressed Grell's face gently and told her he couldn't stay mad at her forever. He then hugged her tight as she started to cry silently. He wiped her tears and told her to be careful from now on. After this, Grell never wanted to return to that dark place. She started working even harder, she wanted to become even better than how she was before the incidents involving Madam Red. She wanted to keep herself together. Grell didn't want any more regrets. She regretted killing Madam Red. She also regretted breaking the rules of the grim reapers for her. But most importantly, she regretted hurting William.During the entire time Grell spent as a grim reaper, she was continuously going up and down. She was continuously making mistakes and fixing them. Grell's mental state was never great. William's sanity was fragile as well. But they had each other. They didn't make each other worse or better, but they kept each other stable. Stable enough so they don't fall into insanity. And for them, that meant a lot. William and Grell had an up and down relationship, but they always felt safe with each other. They would always come back in each other's arms. Grell wished she could be more gentle and more calculated. William wanted to be more relaxed and comfortable with his emotions. Grell would never put anyone before William. Not anymore. He was her main source of happiness. He would treat her with respect, listen to her and calm her when she needed it. Grell also liked William's violent behavior. No, not liked, she loved it. Every single time. She knew it wasn't normal, but she didn't care. This is what she wanted, not as a punishment, but as a form of releasing stress for both of them. William was exactly how she wanted him to be. He would never completely understand her, but Grell realized that this wasn't necessary. She also realized how lucky she was to have William by her side.The only thing Grell would change about William is that she wanted to see him happy. She wanted to heal his wounds. She wanted to see him smiling genuinely. Something he didn't do in so long... Both Grell and William have to work on their personal problems. It would be hard, and it would take time. But they were eager to help each other. Grell promised William she would try to control her impulses. William promised Grell he would try facing his problems if she would help him with it. They changed for the better since then. Seeing William smiling genuinely was all Grell ever wanted... He was happy. He was finally happy with his life. Grell still has many regrets, but now, as she caresses William's head while he's falling asleep next to her, she feels more than happy. She feels more than safe. She feels at peace. William too feels at peace with her. It was all Grell ever wanted.The End
Grell Sutcliff Cosplay 15 (MALE COSPLAYER) by AlexisYokoAlexander
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